I think I left something in your back seat.... It was my integrity
then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
getting caught by my parents in bed with another guy was way easier coming out than telling them over dinner like I had planned.
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
The waitress bought us a round. She said if anyone could do 52 margarita mondays in a row, it was us.
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
I poured everyones drinks into the ice bucket and then stuck my face in it. Apparently I'm a greedy drunk.
If he breaks up with me, your job is to keep me drunk and make sure I don't sleep with anyone. Ok?
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
If your boss lets you sleep on his couch, you don't pay him back by boning his daughter.
I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
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