i wish starbucks made bloody marys
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
I have to keep checking she's breathing. This is why we don't drink on Sundays
found a half eaten roll befind my toilet today. my birthday just keeps popping up.
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
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