Just found out what was wrong with Esther. Turns out she's 33 and still not married. This explains everything.
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
I asked him why the bed was wet and got.."well there are two options... and its not you."
I like how you were offering me $50 last night to come home with you to take care of you and your dog
I'm going to reward myself for having sex with coffee and a breakfast burrito.
What's the best way to tell someone that I accidentally wound up in a gay harem?
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
The bouncers found you passed out on the toilet. They tried to move you but you refused and repeatedly shouted that you wanted to go out like Elvis.
Randomize