I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA!
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
I held a cracker & gaterade down for an hour. I feel like this will be my greatest accomplishment of the day.
You wore a man's plastic top hat last night.
No I didn't. Whiskey did.
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
Hey what are you up to?
I am wear the people with the mustaches live. I have found their home.
DUDE, WE BOUGHT THE ACID TOGETHER.
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
Randomize
