is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
IM A DRUNK BIRTHDAY CLEOPATRA MESS. CELEBRATE THAT BITCH
Honestly I miss having a gay roommate. His female friends' implicit trust in him would carry over to me even though they knew Im straight. Best unintentional wingman ever.
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
How did I pull off convincing everyone that my name is Dad? Maybe they were just distracted by my boobs.
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
So there is a 50% chance that he just left my house and a 100% chance that I have to be up for work in 2 hours...
Whats a polite way to say 'if you havent put on a freshman 15 i would like to see you during break'?
He had a small dick and screamed "I will kill you if you don't get hard" to it in German...awkward time to have to explain I speak German too...
This is why you need to stop sleeping with freshmen.
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
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