Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
Hey! Thanks for asking, but it didnt go well. He threw up in the car on the way to dinner. Blind dates arent for everyone.
I'm at a winery and there's a 50 yr old woman sitting at a table alone with a bottle of wine and the only time I've seen her get up is to harass the hot dog guy
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
He refused to pierce my nipples, saying they are the best he's ever seen and that blemishing them would be a crime
Pro: She likes to masturbate to 50 shades of grey. Con: She reads 50 Shades of grey non-ironically.
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
Randomize
