idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
You were too busy being proud of your penis shaped pancakes to notice...
DUDE EDDIE MURPHY JUST DID A BODY SHOT OFF A HOOKER. IM NEVER COMING HOME
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
I like to imagine god has to get plastered to deal with the fact that he made you and me
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
I slept with my wedding DJ..... I think this means my life has come full circle
I just started an apology with "so I'm sorry about throwing the Brita at your head last night..."
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
Randomize
