Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
Last night you tried to pee on my bed...in the hallway...your room...and the showers. When I finally got you on the toilet you passed out.
NEWS FLASH: A bottle of wine can fit into a taco bell cup.
You know, he picked a really shitty time to stop sleeping with me to pay attention to his girlfriend.
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
Woke up in the middle of my kitchen clutching a cheesy gordita crunch
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
My one night stand said I love you, opened my fridge, stole my cream cheese and left.
you kept shouting 'jesus penis' when i was on the phone with 911
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
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