I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
Do vagina's smell?
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
I just called my cat a slut and she responded. Proudest moment ever.
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
While you were puking in the ocean I was rubbing your back saying "Just give it back to Mother Earth".
21st Birthday Idea: liquor store gift registry. Give me a promotion.
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
I did the crab walk everywhere because I was drunk enough that it was easier than standing up.
In case you were wondering, taking me to see beauty and the beast in theaters would totally get you an unsolicited sloppy beej in the parking lot afterwards.
You should probably take note of that and make it happen.
So I just chugged the rest of the wine in my mug so I would have something to eat my corn flakes in. With a plastic fork. I need a dishwasher
And maybe a life coach?
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
i feel like i should invite him over so he can cockblock my roommate one last time before he graduates. for old times sake, ya know
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
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