that speech was about as successful as her performance in twilight
If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
My shirt is ruined. If I ever get the idea of doing a tequila shot through my nose ever again, shoot me.
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
I was just the victim of a drive by judging in a horse and buggy.
The fuck? Where?
St. Mary's. Amish people. Too high for this.
Nothing brings compassion from a group of cafe workers like walking in and asking if they have a 'hangover special'
Why is there never any toilet paper at his apartment? What does he wipe his ass with? WHAT DOES HE WIPE IT WITH?!?
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
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