Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
I am watching Grease 2 and properly learning how to apply a condom to a banana. This is a sign from God that this is the closest I will ever get to having the need for one.
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
i gotta stop hooking up with people just to get to their dogs
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
Is it sad or funny that I just bought two pregnancy test at the dollar store to give away to people on New Year's Eve while driving for Uber.
He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
Randomize
