One girl and one boy is just not enough.
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
Nah it's cool, I made him pinky promise me he wouldn't die if I left him passed out in the bathroom.
I mean, once you get beat with a dildo you can't look at someone the same
Just picture a dyson vacuum with razor blades. That's how it felt.
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
I can't keep up with all the guys you're banging. I'm just going to start referring to them by city of origin.
Not a problem, sailor. I speak both autocorrect and typo.
Is it tacky to frame a negative pregnancy test?
Bro you were on fire last night...like a less Irish version of Liam Neeson
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
You'll love it there. Trust me. Cheap tequila, pretentious beer, tall white guys who will treat you badly. Its got everything you like.
Randomize