the family i'm sitting with looks like the Addams family. Except for the daughter...she looks like Shrek
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
i was on the fence about his sexual orientation until he referred to his marlboro loghts as "carrie bradshaws"
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
I found you walking along the street hammered. You walked up said hi and handed me a beer.
Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
How does one take the "you're the best sex I've ever had but I'm marrying someone that's sub-par in the sack" mind fuck?
I pity the fool.
Thanks Mr T.
whatever, tonight I’ll be getting my ass eaten by an aussie so we good
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