I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
I woke up with $100 in my pocket and I was so excited until I found an atm receipt for a $500 withdrawal. Not as exciting.
It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
you stumbled up the stairs in your heels, pulled 23 one-dollar bills out of your bra and then went and puked in the toilet. didnt say a single thing to me the whole time
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
My Valentine's Day plans just drastically changed... My F buddy just ran into my gf...in my driveway.
I was changing in front of my window and my neighbor text me saying, "nice pubes."
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
not a day goes by that I don't wish you were here or I there. Today it was because I had the desire to get high and go look at the jellyfish at the aquarium and you're the perfect buddy for that.
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
Randomize
