I think i sorta joined a cult last night
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
Sam was like the mother fucking Moses of drunk and underage kids and he lead them to safety away from the cops. He's a hero that we deserve.
bullshit you weren't drunk, you pointed at me and said my cigarette was empty
Isis wins if we don't have the loudest, kinkiest sex in every part of my house tomorrow
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
I will bring Jesus to court if he punishes me for that
Have you considered murder?
Other than my credit score and this bowl of oatmeal, not really. It's very messy
Randomize
