wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
my mom found me passed out in the kitchen floor with the Brita pitcher.. Happy Mothers Day
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
I am literally so hung over that I just opened up my emergency kit, got out a survival meal replacement bar and ate it.
My manager gave me an envelope with money in it before he had vacation, and when I asked what it was for, he said it will be his bail money.
In my defense, the second lapdance I gave was because of a dare.
Randomize
