yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
I'm sitting in the middle of them on his bed, forcing them to watch Brokeback Mountain. I am the best cock blocker ever.
Just checked my phone. Sometime last night I googled sex positions in a tent. Was there even a tent there?
How many people slept in the bouncy castle last night?
4 guys, 1 girl. Pretty sure were gonna have to pay the cleaning fee
My tweets this weekend consisted of me telling every bar I went to that they were my favorite valentine. I've never felt like more of an alcoholic
A stripper just invited me to her daughter's birthday. Where did my life go wrong?
Alright if I email the police department asking for my mug shot do you think they will email it to me
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
Don't date the locals. They're all tainted.
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
Randomize
