doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
Best friends brother. Beat that.
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
Yeah... I still gave her a hug because I felt really bad though. I mentioned that my boyfriends grandma just died too, just to reinforce that I'm straight afterwards.
I just heard a 350 lb guy with a stutter describe getting blood in his eye as he was shanking his cellmate and, more generally, how to survive as a white guy in jail.\n\nYou should really consider going to some AA meetings
My life is over. I farted in open court. Noticeably. The judge looked at me. It echoed.
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
I just puked into a clean basket of laundry.
Randomize
