Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
Dude if you're in another zip code it doesn't count
You don't understand. I'm not like you.
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
He kept insisting that I was going to have an orgasm but it just felt like he was rubbing sand paper on my vagina
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
I love your family. Oh. And on a completely unrelated note, I know where we can steal a dog.
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
I choose McDonald's breakfast at 1:28am over sex anytime
I woke up on his couch and my bra was flung across the floor and filled with animal crackers
He sent me a dick pic. I am fighting the urge to send him a "sorry for your loss" card.
I'm in the liquor store and fucking "Wannabe" by the Spice Girls is playing. IM ALREADY ASHAMED OF MY REASON FOR BEING HERE, GIVE ME A BREAK.
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
Note to self: I can rip apart her vagina and she'll still cuddle with me, but if I steal her Chapstick she'll murder me !?
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