i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
I just fucked 3 marines at the same time...how did you celebrate veterans day?
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
I think the fact that my first kiss is now in a porno says a lot about why my life is the way it is
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
Just woke up to find myself cooking eggs on the imaginary stove in my room.
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
I'm too depressed to masturbate. This election is the worst.
Of course he’s picking me up at the airport. I taught him the Lotus position last time we had sex.
Randomize