better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
I cagt a turtle and named him squirt. He's in my bathtub Caleb is feeding me peaches! This is the most beautiful vodka Thursday ever!
There are apples in the microwave and a cup of twigs in the fridge. I think she's hiding in the pantry, I can hear her giggling. Leaving her to it.
thought the power was flickering out but it turns out im just blinking
At second job interview this week. Wearing pants to hide pole dancing bruises. This my life.
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
Also I stopped in the middle of the road and put my hazards on because BUNNIES WERE PLAYING
It's gotten to a point that when guys say "I'm gonna cum" I've developed a habit of responding "dooo itttt" in a deep voice. #isthatweird
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
Is there ever a non-asshole time to play the "I was a child prodigy" card?
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
He deliberately gets me high because he knows I fuck better and then I make food for two. I don't know if I should feel mad or proud of him for thinking that far.
Randomize
