I though she ruined it by crying, then I realized it wasn’t a tear, it was my great aim. It turned out to be beautiful.
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
i'm way too high for it to be safe that i just discovered i have a fire extinguisher
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
Dude, I woke up with wet dollar bills in my boxers where did you take me???
Of course, it's a law of friendship. "Thy friend Shalt always hold hatred for thine friend's swinish ex"
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
Because you hugged a homeless guy, and I paid him 5 bucks to give us our giraffe balloon animal back. That's why.
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
All three of the bartenders here have screwed my boss, so he's definitely gay. Unfortunately for you he seems to have a type and you're not it.
Randomize
