like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
The guy in front of me in lecture is using a fifth of smirnoff as a water bottle.
Nevermind, it's not water.
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
Just woke up next to our cab driver from last night. Please tell me this isn't happening.
That's cool. At least the punch line of my story isn't I shit in a booth at Denny's.
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
Emojis can't explain what he felt when that ass dropped
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
He literally shouted this Viking war cry when he cam. Then as we laid there he sang me the most beautiful rendition of " When Irish Eyes are Smiling". I've never been more confused.
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