you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
My professor just used "labia" and "numchucks" in the same sentence. I am dying.
i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
on a related note, did you know that the fire alarm in our apartment talks?
Upperdeckered the toilet. Took sombrero off, drawing too much heat. Witnessed glassing. In bush, come findme.
I remember now some guy came over and hit on me and poured peppermint schnapps and chocolate syrup in my mouth. Pretty sure he was dressed like Santa....
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.
I'm still amazed at how you managed to get Doritos in my damn front pocket without me noticing. I got crumbs everywhere.
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
Randomize
