he came in the shower with me...i thought it was going to be nice and romantic...until he started peeing on my leg.
I hijacked a bellboy cart and rolled into the party dancing on it
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
Cop came to our door looking for you. Something about sex in public and intoxication. I said you matched the description.
Sometimes you have a life bucket list item checked off like 4 tits in your face simultaneously and getting to bang them both. I'm sorry I bailed on skiing but not really. Coming over with a boombox playing 'heat of the moment' as soon as I can hail a cab cause I'm too drunk to drive still...
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
You slapped my ass and yelled "HOOTY TOOTY WHAT A BOOTY" in a Schwarzenegger voice
He sent me a picture of a gas station condom and said "we probably shouldn't use this but if I was to impregnate someone on accident I'd want it to be you"
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
He tried to get me to go back to his place on the condition that he has 6 cats. I was very tempted but I said no. Hoping to go see the cats tomorrow
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
Stop thinking about me and go on your date... at least I got the glitter off your face first.
Just learned a very valuable life lesson. Never motorboat a cat when they have claws.
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
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