porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
Make sure your heart doesn't explode. These are words of wisdom.
He paid me $20 to swallow a baggie of glitter, which turned out to be the best decision I've ever made. My vomit has never been prettier.
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
Eating cold pizza and drinking a beer for breakfast while standing in a hotel window naked is how I say hello September...
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
omg i wish you could see the front of my car.
There's literally a dust print of your body and your arm trying to hold on and the other one where your fingers visibly dragged down the hood.
I remember saying to him "Fun fact! If you lie this way it's easier to deep throat!" I even judge me.
I'm working on a search warrant...can u pick up box of Chardonnay...I'll give u cash when u get here...
Yea... I love that ur a prosecutor and drink box wine
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
Can we relax the "married man" rule just once?
I JUST SENT A TOILET SELFIE TO THE WRONG PERSON.
Randomize
