Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
Monday: I just need a drink Tuesday: OMG no more this week! Wednesday: oh shit how'd I get drunk Thursday: I'm glad you've stopped the pretenses
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
Chasing shots with sriracha-covered mini toast was, in retrospect, not the best idea.
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
This morning when you were fucking me you said you'd go to the store and get me tampons and a 30 pack
One day he'll find out I do drugs and stop talking to me.
What will you do then?
Drugs, probably.
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
Randomize
