Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
Dude, fuck the siberian warm up. You can't put vodka in hot chocolate. Learn from my mistakes
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
I swear I can't go out anymore. It's like he put a GPS in my dick. I don't know if I should feel awkward or proud...
Captain America stopped by our tailgate. He ate a taco.
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
Powdered alcohol is a real thing now. Move over crystal light... Water bottles rejoice!!
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
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