I Once took so much Ecstacy that I tried to hug a fire.
I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
He was rambling about life and dignity and happiness. but all i kept thinking was PENIS. YOU HAVE A PENIS. I CAN SHOW YOU WHERE TO PUT THAT PENIS.
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
That chick needs a catscan. And fuck it, we're still ordering in a stripper
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
In local news "Man Stabbed With Golf Club" next person who tells me this is a safe place to live gets punched...
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
Dude. That's like masturbating until the point that you're going to climax, then stopping, waiting for a few seconds and then starting all over. While that does lead to an altogether more powerful orgasm, it's still annoying as hell until you get there.
I was not expecting that analogy.
No one ever expects that analogy.
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
Randomize