I love you
are you drunk
yes but I def love you, we should get married
But I'm Jewish
embrace Jesus
I never want to see another naked old woman again.
Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
should my penis look like a turkey
this morning your mother said to me "sorry to have to meet you like this, in my sons bed" later she said "you never know whos gonna be in there. its scary sometimes"
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
I just test ran being their maid. I'm getting 50 bucks a month and they're buying the costume.
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
I just overheard an "I'm going to get your dick so hard" conversation at Costco.
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
I was lying I actually don't, I hope a reindeer shitted in her bed
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
If it makes you feel any better, I can't find the goldfish I dropped like five minutes ago.
Randomize
