addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
I love him more than I love myself. Which is a lot...Because I'm narcissistic.
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
everyday i am more and more thankful i can still check the no box for "have you ever been convicted of a felony?" on applications
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
Hey can we break in your window? We need to borrow the dog.
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
she asked him to cuddle cuz she was cold and instead he got up, moved the space heater to her side of the bed, and went back to sleep
I have the most nasty and explicit wet dreams of my boss that I'm embarrassed to look him in the face. I'd be pregnant or promoted if he only knew
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
Just checked out of walmart with a 30 pack of Budlight and a wiffle bat. Hello, Monday night.
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