explain to me why "crisis hotline lolz" is in my contacts?
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
Her husband keeps getting drunk and making out with me. Good news is I found the strep carrier. Bad news is have strep again.
he made a bald eagle out of coke lines
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
He's gotta be able to drive a truck, make me mac n cheese and give me the best orgasms. That's my perfect man
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day 😐💀#pensacolaproblems
Beer Olympics must happen in honor of the legit Olympics.
Randomize
