Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
Im broke. I spend all my money on weed cigarettes alcohol and food. In that order. I cant even cut one of those because you know it'd be food. I already stopped getting my nails done just so i could support my bad habits.
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
I just yelled at a bunch of girl scouts for yelling "cookies" to loudly. That hungover
If he tries to stick his thumb up my butt again im going to rip his dick off with my vagina
I told you those kegels would come in handy one day
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
I'm in the freezer. Shit took away any trace of hangover outa my body.
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
all my friends are getting married and here i am in a committed relationship with rum
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
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