You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
I truly believe that the solid foundation of any healthy relationship is a drunken one night stand so I can just get all the nasty shit out on the table
I learned an important lesson this weekend.... I'm way to good at sex to travel for it. From now on he drives here...
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
why is my underwear the only thing i was wearing that smells like vodka?
He tried to give me a shoulder massage while i peed in the neighbors bushes to "make it more relaxing."... I let him... That drunk
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
So to recap Superbowl Sunday - I won $100, bumped into the anti-christ and his cult, met a guy in a kilt and a wican, then got invited to a gayguy afterhours party.
Gonna be tough to beat that next year!
The only thing I had in my freezer before today was patron and cheese.
dying me prepared for dead me... i woke up with my laptop open to the last snl episode, a bottle of gatorade, advil and a bag of chocolate all next to me
I accidently sent a dick pic to the group chat with her family. Right after they all said it was a pleasure having me for dinner. Wana drink with me?
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
This may be the most redneck thing I've ever said, but I know all there is to know about farting dogs
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