i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
Are you missing anything? I found a wedding ring in my bed this morning.....
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
I just ran into the couch, vagina first.
I hope you got dinner out of it
please tell me i can get drunk off sparkling grape juice. even if you have to lie, please say yes.
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
I'm about to sell my hamster for weed money I'll call you in a few
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
Tonight I learned to never try to impress your ex by dancing on the stripper pole while drunk. That’s how you end up in the ER
Randomize
