ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
We found you naked curled up in a ball in the closet, using a gorilla suit as a blanket
why are our drunk alter egos so much more successful than us?
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
Also my face is like def lowkey made of silly putty
New low: eating a buttered roll while taking a shit.
This is why we're soulmates.
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
DO NOT TRY TO APPROACH HER CAT. IT IS A DEMON CAT FROM SATAN'S BALLS AND IT *WILL* TRY TO KILL YOU. I SPEAK FROM EXPIRENCE.
It's not my fault, Tequila turned all my alarms off.
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
if I hear Wonderful Christmastime one more time I'm putting my foot up Paul McCartney's ass.
Randomize
