return my video game
the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
I'm so hungover i just sang the alphabet to see if "Z" comes after "W"
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
She volunteers at a homeless shelter. You volunteered to drink 7 day expired milk for $3. No chance. Give up.
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
Forgot my sound was off and didnt even realize it until halfway through because I thought I could hear it. I think high me just narrated half a clip of adventure time
Apparently I've told this bouncer I stalk him on Instagram 3 times. I should stop drinking. I only remeber saying it tonight. early sign of Alzheimer's
I wanna die. I can't recall the last time I was happy that doesn't involve your hand touching my butt.
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
I'm trying to behave my vagina this week so I can at least pretend I'm honoring the sanctity of marriage
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
Randomize
