the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
just threw the rents a curveball by making french toast and bacon when i came home sober. good luck tellin when im high/drunk now.
i left after you tried to balance a shot of tequila on your head while screaming at the bar tender that you fucked his girlfriend
I'm hiding her cosmo magazine. the only sex tip she needs is to not handcuff her boyfriend to her roommates bed and lose the key
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
I'll get you through man, I'll be your fairy godmother with better prescription drugs
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
Every time I burp I plan an escape route because I'm scared I'm gonna puke on grandma
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
I like to listen to classical music when I eat taco bell. I think it cancels out the aura of poverty and desperation.
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
Randomize
