i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
I'm going to go hang out on a giant wooden pirate ship for 5 days.
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
Best. Handjob. Ever.
I'm guessing Kelly is over?
Nope. Home alone.
Until you find your self finger banging supergirl in the middle of the dance floor while her friends are passing around for luigi mustache for a photo op, YOU HAVE NOT HIT MY LEVEL
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
She's blowing me while I'm watching air jaws. I love shark week.
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
Are you missing a tooth after last night? Because I found one in my coat pocket...along with what smells like dried jäger and a package of deer jerky.
Uh not that I recall.
Oh wait nvm. It's mine. Yeup, definitely my tooth.
Randomize
