the guy working at the drive-thru just asked me if i wanna bang after he gets off work tonight.
given your current drought situation, im genuinely curious to know what your answer was
i told him maybe and gave him my number. sad? probably. but even if the sex is bad maybe i'll get a free burger out of it
Dude, totally just found out that I've been washing my hair with semen for the past 3 weeks.
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
Aaaand I cut your bangs with a large knife last night ...
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
I tried to pay my tab and go home but she wrote me a "list of things I'm good at" with fellatio as no 1...
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
Come help me clean and have sexual intercourse with me
Bring breadsticks
And for some reason every time I get drunk I just want to tell you that I have a mini secret personal fan club of your dick
I don't think it's a coincidence that the day I just happen to do the splits at the gym I come back with 7 guys' phone numbers.
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
Randomize
