I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
being pregnant is like rehab
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
Please don't make me ever have to hear the words "the Queen's gynecologist" ever again.
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
Cause I'll toss Tabasco sauce in his eyes and yell "Cobra attack" and walk away
Look, his dick is so good at being a dick that it makes me see God. And I don't even believe in God.
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
Randomize
