Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
The guy that just projectile vomited over the balcony is now going down to find the pill he just puked up. He said he wasn't about to waste $15.
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
My contribution to the dinner party was a bottle of vodka and a bag of uncooked potatoes. I felt like a Russian serf.
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
What am I supposed to say? "Hi new uncle in law once I tried cocaine in Mexico and every once in a while i motorboat strangers. so happy to be a part of your family"
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
i literally have the attention span of a weasel on steroids, but yeah, i know who you’re talking about.
Just find a separated / divorcing man. They’re too upset to fall in love, too helpless to be alone and too horny to think straight. Smile at him the right way and he’ll be thrilled to be with a sexy younger woman!
Randomize
