So... how did lowering your standards work out last night?
the only thing i have to deal with now is the fact that i'm still wearing spandex shorts from last night
i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
I just want a pillowcase full of fast food so I can eat and sleep this hangover away
I'm watching my cat lick a used condom wrapper on my nightstand and I'm too hungover to move and do anything about it. Tequila Tuesdays can not be a thing.
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
I'm disproportionately drunk. But I also spelled disproportionately right twice so maybe I'm not that drunk
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
Randomize
