just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
I found him with a guitar and his kitten in his room. He was singing a song he'd titled "you're a cat". Guess what most of the lyrics were...
He stumbled into my room, flopped on my bed, shoes on my pillow and asked me for a juice box. Then fell asleep with the juice box on his forehead.
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
See, the Lortab wasn't working enough, so I thought "hey, vodka can speed that up! That's how science works!" Which probably should've been my indication that the Lortab was in fact working
I basically have the attention span of a ferret on meth when it comes to men
I woke up in an ill fitting childs tutu this morning and the shower curtain is knocked down. Wtf happened?
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
You know I base where I go on the likelihood of me getting laid there. This includes work.
where the fuck are you? she just tazed two people and we're tripping shrooms...successful first night in new apartment!
Randomize
