Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
oh my god. my mom just found my pipe. she thought it was a dildo.
like i said, there should be a sitcom about your family.
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
That penis you're staring at is the penis of heartbreak. Stay away. It will break your heart AND keep you away from other penises. BACK. OFF. THE PENIS.
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
YOU TRIED TO SWIM IN HER FISHTANK. I don't think she's going to call you.
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
Randomize
