Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
Just got a blowjob to the theme of Bohemian Rhapsody as the sun was rising. I should just kill myself because ill never top this moment.
sitting next to michael phelps in the airport. wonder if he's carrying...
I need someone to meet me at the end of the road and throw captain morgan at my face like they do with water at marathons
He's. Duct. Taping. His. Phone. To. The. Wall.
Just saw a midget on an elliptical. Epic.
I don't want to ruin date night, but you have no idea how hard it is to poop whilst looking at cute puppies.
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
dude it was our first time and her hair caught on fire from the candles on the nightstand
There is no way that actually happened!
the smell of burnt hair covered up the sweaty sex smell.
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
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