we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
And then he asked the cop "shall i shut off the lady gaga?" as he was being frisked.
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
Pass out mid-funnel last night.
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
we just finished making mockaritas... then we prayed
god you guys know how to party
worst. bachelorette party. ever.
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
I hijacked a bellboy cart and rolled into the party dancing on it
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
He was chasing Ciroc shots with sips of Captain Morgan... he didn't make it to midnight
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
I'm allotting you four buildings to piss on tonight. Choose wisely.
Hahah I’ve never had someone stop me mid-coitus to tell me how amazing I am. Def ego boost.
I am real keen for none of this to be taken out of context so let’s just shut it down right now
Randomize