Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
I saved $70 from being to drunk to go out last night so I figured I could buy a new watch.
MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
Lost my key. Fell asleep on the doorstep and got woken up by host grandma poking me with a broom.
Im just a social blackout drinker.
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
my vag sweat smells like doritos
so now that we're not dating you have to stop sending shit like this to me okay?
He grabbed my tits and sang "you are so beautiful" to them before faceplanting into my chest
It was a "have 911 on speed dial" kinda night
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
Randomize
