I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
He came to the party late, didn't bring tacos, and then asked what shennanigans we were getting into. I swear I will never fuck another hipster.
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.
If your wondering why there is a puddle on the floor is I may have decided to make a kiddie pool in your living room.
You understand the drunkenness of my drunkenness
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
10/10 dentists agree that he is one bangable mother fucker. hint: i am all of these dentists.
is that a dick in a sweater?
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
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