I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
cynthia nixon should never get laid more than me
They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
Dude, seduce him with cookies. You almost turned me gay with scones. Don't be surprised when they get you laid.
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
Guy fieri is speaking only to me. We make eye contact. My whole body is vibrating. My head is purring. I am literally marbles.
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
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