you were so high you were expressing yourself in action figures
they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
you left a note on your car that said " please dont tow, im to drunk to drive. safety first!"
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
He told me his penis would be a "Sad Panda" if I didn't give it a ride through the jungle.
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
I ended up taking shots of whiskey and chasing them with potato wedges, I have never felt more Irish
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
Random question, what's John-that-we-had-a-threesome-with's phone number? Don't necessarily need the full number, maybe just area code? Think I drunkenly ran into him last night and now I have texts from a John.
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
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